Organized Chaos...

life

2011-03-29T14:17:00.002-05:00

I am learning alot about myself on this lonely, lonely, road that I have called life over the past year or so...

...learning who I am...

....what I like to do...

....who I like to hang out with...

...what those people mean to me...

...what I am passionnate about...

...and why those things matter...

...and that it really IS ok to be ME!!...

it has been hard, lonely (have I mentioned that yet??) and frustrating. but it is making me who i am. it's not what i have imagined or would dream for myself, but i am here.

and i will embrace this crazy thing we call "life".

2011-01-03T11:53:00.000-06:00

2011

2010-12-31T18:37:00.000-06:00

Perhaps the fuss about midnight is rooted in the possibility that things can be new.

Here's to healing.

Here's to change.

Welcome, 2011...

525,600 minutes worth of redemption

What do I know?

2010-10-25T09:33:00.002-05:00

Sorry about the blogging hiatus...been busy! But here is a little piece of my heart today...

If you know me, you know I am big on words of songs with a powerful meaning. Here is the song I now have on repeat.

"I made you promisesa thousand times

I tried to hear from Heaven

But I talked the whole time

I think I made you too small

I never feared you at all

If you touched my face, would I know you?

Looked into your eyes, could I behold you?

What do I know of you who spoke me into motion?

Where have I even stood

But the shore along your ocean?

Are you fire? Are you fury?

Are you sacred? Are you beautiful?

What do I know? What do I know of holy?

I guess I thought that I had figured you out

I knew all the stories and I learned to talk about

How you were mighty to save

Those were only empty words on a page

Then I caught a glimpse of who you might be

The slightest hint of you brought me down to my knees. "

-Addison Road

summertime!

2010-06-01T15:26:00.002-05:00

it's summer, but that doesn't mean a break from school!

it's been awhile...

nursing school took up the majority of my life in the spring.

i had a month off and of course, i was a nomad.

i was between cedartown and birmingham the whole month.

it was nice to have a break, but i WILL say i am thankful for the consistency that comes with a school schedule.

there really isn't much new going on with me.

just laying low and surviving...

i passed my first semester of nursing school with flying colors, and i couldnt be more certain that i am cut out for this!

i really hope that this summer class doesn't make me eat those words!

525,600 minutes

2009-12-28T15:05:00.003-06:00

2009...

...oh what a year. while i wouldn't change it because of the invaluable life lessons i have learned, i would never choose to re-live it.

ive learned alot about my faith, life in general, family, and friends.

the biggest things that happened are already on my blog, as i usually only update when something life defining has happened

(which this year proved to be more often than not!)

i rang in the new year at the ULTIMATE nye party...times square. what an experience!

i saw celine dion in concert

my nephew was officially adopted

i turned 28 in March

(started off pretty good, right?)

i was in birmingham...living and working.

in transition. and a whole lotta doubting.

...when....

i got a new job offer

and acceptance into nursing school with in days of each other

followed immediately by the decision to stick with my commitment to move to atlanta

and then, soon after i moved...an intruder at 3am

and the dreaded gall bladder attack which resulted in a week long stay at emory hospital with 2 procedures

followed by a week of trying to recover

only to end up back at emory

that's when my car caught on fire and was destroyed

and the kicker... lost my job, grrrrr

and i felt stripped. i will never forget that feeling.

and i pray that i never do.

so, i moved home...for 2 weeks and recomposed....or tried to, anyways

and i decided to take the LPN route for nursing school and live with the Haynes

...and lo and behold, it slowed down...

then on december 12, i lost my precious grandfather. it was a hard process to go through - watching him slowly die- and that process reminded me that our lives are so short and so precious.

to be honest, to re-visit this list and the emotions i felt when these things were happening, is tough. but one thing that keeps coming to mind is how my family was there and stood by me (or sat in a chair next to my bedside at emory) through it all.

my heart is overwhelmed with thankfulness for that.

i think my life was too complex and unrealistic. and i am starting to finally enjoy the simplicity of things in life and be ok with not going ninety-to-nothing. i really don't need 1,200 friends on facebook. i really don't have to have the nicest things. it's ok (yet hard) to see that out of a ton of friendships, only a few have stood through the fire with me. i don't have to have things go "my way" to be satisfied. i can drive a 1998 car and be alright. i can be scared for my life when i wake up to my alarm blaring and a man standing at my door, yet feel peaceful, knowing my life is safe in the arms of Jesus.

because my treasure is stored in heaven.

goodbye, 2009...dont let the door hitcha on the way out

"experience: the most brutal of teachers. but you learn. my god, do you learn" - cs lewis

a quote to hang on to

2009-10-29T07:30:00.005-05:00

"Experience: the most brutal of teachers.

But you learn.

My God, do you learn."

-C.S.Lewis

i am walking through the 'healing process'. i am also working through forgiving people who i feel have wronged me and since i have been forgiven for so so much, i will, one day soon, be able to completely forgive and love these people.

i feel like i am finally able to calm this anxious heart of mine.

i am learning oh so much.

what baffles me is this:

i cannot find it in me to regret the move to atlanta.

it would probably be easier if i did regret it. but honestly, i would do it all over again.

God showed up in a mighty way through these trials. he is still showing up.

in the past few months, i have learned more life lessons than i would ever imagine.

i tell people everyday:

"this is not what i would have chosen...but this is where i am"

my hope is that i will not miss a second of living while walking through this process.

I must be doing SOMETHING right...

2009-10-15T12:12:00.004-05:00

"Live life in such a way that you have great stories to tell..."

got this from my friend, brett's blog.

i do have a few pretty good stories to tell.

just a few.

plan B...or C. or whatever we call it now...

2009-10-12T18:43:00.003-05:00

i am moving forward. with a contingent plan...

today, i applied to gadsden state's LPN program that starts in january.

i will finish in a year and be able to work as a nurse for a while and save up some money before becoming a RN.

i will be living with the Haynes' and going back to Grace.

this plan excites me (although LPN isn't what i would have chosen before)

but i am skeptical, hoping it doesn't fall through.

i am still waiting on my AL substitute teaching certificate to come in.

but when it does, i plan on substituting and babysitting, etc until school starts in january.

i still have to find a car...this week. any help would be appreciated!

i am looking for a used car that is in good shape.

just wanted to keep you faithful blog reading friends of mine in 'the know'

it's been a week, how ya doin'?

2009-10-07T13:15:00.003-05:00

"you've been through alot the past month.

really, katy, HOW ARE YOU?"

i am getting that daily. and to be honest, it changes daily.

but overall, i really am ok.

being at home with my family has been a nice change of pace, so far.

as with anything, i am going through a grieving process.

i have been in shock.

i have been sad.

i have been hurt.

i have been angry...oh so angry.

i have felt guilty, and tried to think of everything i did wrong at the job.

i have questioned God.

and i have been embarrassed.

i am finally to the point where i want to move forward,

whatever that means.

i wake up day to day and start from there.

one day at a time...

i do still get angry sometimes...

when i think of the sacrifice i made of nursing school and how that wasn't considered when "letting me go"

how i lost my job in just enough time to miss the deadlines

for nursing school for the spring...grrr ('tis true, 'tis true)

and when i think of the most immediate need i have - buying a car - and what poor poor timing i feel this is to have 2 weeks left of having a rental car and having to buy a car..with no income.

i was looking at 2010 honda accords, but there is no way i can get a new car with no income.

i will be honest, though, it will be nice not to have a car payment, especially through nursing school.

and plans....

oh plans....

right now i am looking for jobs.

i applied to about 20 this week in the cedartown/rome area.

i am not sure what i need to look for because there is a small chance i can get into nursing school at wallace in the spring, and if i do that, i don't need to commit to a long-term job.

substitute teaching would be ideal, but northwest ga isn't hiring anymore subs.

i did go get my certification to be a substitute teacher in calhoun county (alabama)

i am living with my brother and his wife and son (kyle, shannon and hunter) as of now.

i may end up going to the haynes' and staying there for a bit, if i decide to sub for a while.

one thing is for certain: wherever i live, i will be going back to my church that i love, GRACE.

thanks for your prayers, concern, love, affirmation, open arms,

and grace during the past month.

the truth about grace

2009-10-07T12:37:00.005-05:00

u2 played last night in atlanta.

i was suposed to go but just wasn't ready to be back there yet, so i sold my ticket. it was definitely the hype of my twitter and facebook, for sure. everything about it - from the unbelievable stage to bono singing

" AMAZING GRACE "was 'tweeted' and 'status update-d' about.

a friend shared this article and i would love for you all to read it here

he is making an impression on so many with his genius style of music,

the symbolism in the words of his songs,

the props they use,

and lastly,

the truth about grace.

enjoy and be encouraged.

i do not know what to do....

2009-10-07T09:06:00.005-05:00

...O Lord, keep my eyes on you....

...For we are powerless against this great horde that is coming against us.

We do not know what to do, but our eyes are on you....

Thus says the Lord to you,

‘Do not be afraid and do not be dismayed at this great horde, for the battle is not yours but God's....

You will not need to fight in this battle. Stand firm, hold your position, and see the salvation of the Lord on your behalf, O Judah and Jerusalem.’ Do not be afraid and do not be dismayed. Tomorrow go out against them, and the Lord will be with you.”

2 Chronicles 20:12, 15-17

These words of our Lord have given me comfort.

There is nothing I could have done (although sometimes I think differently)

in the past few months to change the "events" that he allowed in my life.

I did nothing to cause them, it has been in his plan all along.

Again, I don't want to miss the journey. I want to see and savor the Lord every step of this ride.

And oh! what a ride it has been!

Lord, i do not know what to do next.

i am unable to keep my eyes on you.

keep my eyes and heart focused.

help!

2009-10-06T19:19:00.000-05:00

anyone know of any jobs out there?

or any used cars?

que sera

2009-10-03T13:09:00.006-05:00

"que sera, sera, life goes on...

whatever's meant to be will always be...

and what don't kill you will make you strong...

just love the journey that you're on..."

sara evans said it best.

these words are stuck in my head, mainly because i want to live it out.

yes, i am still hurting.

yes, i am still upset.

yes, i am freaking out about what is next.

yes, i am utterly exhausted.

no, i never thought i would be back in cedartown.

no, this is not ideal.

no, i do not have "plans" yet.

but i don't want to miss the journey i am on..

...one day at a time...

i told my parents today at lunch that i literally felt like my life was starting over.

take it how you want. i definitely have mixed feelings about it.

i have to buy a car in the next few weeks...without an income.

i have to find some sort of job.

i have to unpack, again.

"...just love the journey that you're on..."

now what, katy?

2009-09-30T17:20:00.004-05:00

i am literally taking it one day/second/event at a time

...mainly because there is only enough grace for that right now.

i am in birmingham spending a few days and i will be back in atlanta on friday afternoon to start packing. i will live with my brother (kyle) for a while and probably take the next few months to heal from the past month's events.

this has been an extremely hard hit and i am in no way ready to make another "decision" right now. i am not emotionally stable enough, nor am i confident enough for that.

i am ready to move forward, just not sure what that looks like right now.

stripped

2009-09-28T14:29:00.003-05:00

just to update you all...

i lost my job today. the details are many so i will spare you of them all, but it's nothing i have done or anything that is negotiable. i am recieving a week's pay and i am on my way.

this is very hard for me and i am not handling it very well. i can't make sense of it. i have alot of decisions to make, but won't start that until i am more emotionally stable.

i feel like i am being stripped...

...of my health

...of my car

...of financial stability

...of my job

...and of my dignity.

i am the most upset because i sacrificed my 'dream' of nursing school to move to atlanta and now i am left with nothing.

your prayers are coveted.

i am really ready to blog about something fun and not so 'heavy'...

i believe...

2009-09-23T08:57:00.003-05:00

" ...that i shall look upon the goodness of the Lord in the land of the living!" Psalm 27:13

"...Lord, help my unbelief" Mark 9:24

slow down

2009-09-19T17:34:00.006-05:00

i'm just gonna be honest.

i don't even know where to start....

to explain this story,

how i feel about the past month in atlanta,

where i think God is in all of this

my car is gone. blown up. charred. burned. zip. zilch. nada.

the story goes something like this:

i was so excited because i thought i had made it through one week without any big mis-haps. there hasn't been a "normal" week to date since i moved to atlanta on aug 15.

it was normal until about 1:55 yesterday.

i was driving and i stopped at a red light. the car shut off. then i noticed it was smoking.

so i tried to re-crank it and it wouldn't.

so i turned on my hazardous lights and popped the hood and jumped out onto the curb

(with only my phone and keys- i left my purse, gps, ipod, everything else in the car--i mean who EXPECTS their car to blow?!?!).

i was trying to figure out who to call, what to do, and a man who was walking past my car says "mam, if this is your car, you need to go tell that police officer, because it is on fire!"

"FIRE?!?!?! you have GOT to be kidding me!!!!!!!"

so i take off sprinting to the nearest officer and say in desperation

"call the fire department my car is on fire!!"

the officer runs over to my car (which is in flames by now) and screams

"everyone run, the fuel line is fixin' to blow!!!"

so we did.

and the car exploded.

about a minute later, the firetrucks (all 4 of them) arrived to help extinguish what was left of my car.

at this point i am bawling my eyes out thinking "this cannot be happening!" but it was.

the fire was taking over the inside of my car.

the glass was cracking..it was engulfing.

the firefighters get there and bust all of the windows out so that they can fight the fire.

about 15 minutes goes by and the fire is out and what is left of my car is sitting in the middle of the street (downtown decatur) with all roads blocked off.

there were so many people who came up to me during all of this.

one group of people came and offered to take me out for drinks.

one man was snapping pictures of me as i was talking to the MAYOR of Decatur.

yes, the mayor came and sat with me.

the firemen were exceptionally nice.

another sweet lady just sat there and held me while i cried.

and then a sweet girl about my age walked down the street asking if i was ok.

we talked for a few minutes and we made a connection of mutual friends.

she sat with me and asked if she could pray with me and of course i said "YES! please!!"

to say the least, decatur is a mixed bag of folks.

so, that is where i am. and one day, this is gonna be a great story to tell.

and one day it will be really funny.

but it's not that funny to ME right now.

i can't blame some of you for laughing because of the insanity my life has been full of since i moved to atlanta. i have a rental car now and i'm on the hunt for a new car.

i only had 6 payments left on my corolla!!!!

again, i will be honest.

i am not enjoying the hand God has dealt me since i have moved to decatur.

i haven't had the chance to enjoy atlanta.

i haven't been able to meet new friends.

it is sort of an eye opener and there is really only so many obstacles i can face before questioning becomes natural.

but i am soo thankful that i wasn't in the car. everything COULD be much worse.

hey, remember, i have NO commute to work.

it's literally next door.

(can you tell i am digging for things to say here?!?)

yes, i know my gall bladder would have had to come out no matter where i was.

yes, i know i would have gotten the flu and an infection anywhere i lived, and my car was destined to blow.

but all within 3 weeks of each other?

and i am ok questioning God in all of this.

because he can handle it.

and i cannot.

well, i am off to get all new makeup.

mine was destroyed in the car yesterday.

and to look for a new car.

lemons into lemonade, i guess.

this is my portion. and it is good.

2009-09-13T14:59:00.006-05:00

whew. atlanta, could you be a little kinder?

i have been here for a month now and it's been a crazy month.

i have been hospitalized twice and sick 3 out of the 4 weeks.

i still haven't made it through a full work week.

financially, things are ROUGH.

on the way to the hospital the most recent time, i was crying...yes, in pain. but more in frustration, really. "i just want some normalcy, not a 102 temp, aches, and a bum gall bladder!!"

but this is my portion.

and it is good.

i am so thankful that my oldest brother kip lives so close, because both times i was in the ER, he was at my side. he was a big influence on me moving here and i am so glad I did because i am loving being geographically close to them now. i plan on enjoying the closeness soon!

i thought my insurance through UAB ended on august 15. i went in for my gallbladder attack on august 25. my insurance wasn't to take effect here until september 1, so that meant i would have to choose the COBRA option ($350) for continuation of my health insurance through UAB. i just happened to call UAB benefits tuesday and my insurance ends september 15. that means i can save the $350! whew!!

the first night i went to the ER (gallbladder), my friend Jenny was spending the night. so thankful someone was here to drive me.

this past week when i had to go back to the ER, my awesome roommate Cassie was here to take me. so thankful that she sat by my side and fed me truth (and ice chips) while i was so discouraged.

one of my best friends, anna lee, rushed over to atlanta the first time i was admitted at emory and sat with me until my parents could get there. haven't felt that loved in a LONG time.

i have had so many emails, texts, phone calls, facebook messages, etc that i STILL haven't gotten back in touch with everyone. i absolutely have some of the most caring friends a girl could ask for. in 2 states.

above all, i am so thankful that i have parents (namely my mom) who cuts their vacation short and drops whatever she is doing or is planning on doing to be by my side every moment i am under the weather in these past 3 weeks. she has cooked endless amounts of food for me (and Cass), made sure i was comfortable, served me, and been soooooo patient with me when i was even getting on my own nerves!

this is my portion.

and it is good.

...but sweet will be the flower

2009-08-29T19:54:00.006-05:00

"Dear friends, do not be surprised at the painful trial you are suffering, as though something strange were happening to you. But rejoice that you participate in the sufferings of Christ, so that you may be overjoyed when his glory is revealed."

(1 Peter 4:12-13)

Judge not the Lord by feeble sense,

But trust him for his grace;

Behind a frowning providence,

He hides a smiling face.

His purposes will ripen fast,

Unfolding every hour;

The bud may have a bitter taste,

But sweet will be the flower

-William Cowper

...And the chaos in my life

Has been a badge I've worn

Though I have been torn

I will not be moved

I will stumble, I will fall down, but I will not be moved...

-Natalie Grant

gallbladderless. and proud of it.

2009-08-28T14:13:00.005-05:00

out of surgery, feel like woof. still can't be d/c. MD's had complications getting gallbladder out and liver enzymes are high again. i am having another ERCP tomorrow to see why the enzymes are so high if they dont go down by in the morning. thanks for loving me and staying concerned!

Here is a "key" for all the terms I used: haha, didn't even think about it!

dc - discharged
MD- doctor of medicine
liver enzymes - basically the protein in the liver, i look like a jaundiced baby but cant get under lights :)
ERCP- run a light and camera down my throat to see if there are clogged ducts again/see why my levels are so high

They have to intubate me for the ERCP I really do not want to be intubated again, my throat is killing me!

Round 2...

2009-08-28T05:58:00.003-05:00

The MD's just came in and I am going into surgery within the hour. For real this time. Sooo ready to get this thing out!

august 28

2009-08-27T19:42:00.002-05:00

last year, on august 28....i was in physical therapy and i snapped my tendon, leading to a second surgery.

this year on august 28....i will have my gall bladder removed.

oh, the irony...

postponed

2009-08-27T15:02:00.002-05:00

They postponed my surgery. I am now suposed to be having my gallbladder removed tomorrow. Please please please pray that they will be able to do it tomorrow. I am pretty sure this pain isn't letting up until my gallbladder is removed. Thanks for your prayers!

it's a new day...

2009-08-27T08:27:00.007-05:00

...with no news to tell. And I am completely ok with that!

Had a pretty hard night with pain last night. I can have my pain meds every 2 hours, and I went 6 or 8 hours yesterday without it, oops. Never again. I thought that it would feel better by now, but I now see that it's just the pain medicine that is keeping me from the pain I had when I came in the ER. This sucker isn't going to feel better until I get it out!!! I will be happy to say goodbye today :).

I slept for about 4 hours last night which is the most I have slept since Sunday. Also, my potassium is pretty low (probably because I don't have many--if any-- nutrients going into my body). And my throat is super sore from being intubated yesterday. But overall, I am just glad today is surgery day!

I've been a little shaken and frustrated from time to time, but the Lord has been sweet to give me a deep peace. It takes a bit to find it through the anxiety and details of the week, but it's there. Thanks for your prayers!

update #2

2009-08-26T20:28:00.001-05:00

Out of the ERCP. It went well. The stone that was loose had passed on to my small intestine, which is best case scenario! They put a stint in so that if another needs to pass, it can. They have seen it necessary to squeeze me in tomorrow for surgery, so I will be having my gall bladder removed around 2pm tomorrow.

I let my pain get away from me tonight after the ERCP (stupid me!) so now I am paying for it. In a good deal of pain, so just pray it subsides. Feels like it did before I came here :(.

Oh yeah, I finally get to eat and drink...for a few hours. I go NPO again at midnight, but you would have thought it was Christmas morning when they told me I could be "freed" from those orders for 4 hours, ha! It's amazing how good a Sprite Zero and saltines are after not eating for 50+ hours!

You know Katy Watters is sick when...diet coke doesn't taste good.

update

2009-08-26T09:02:00.000-05:00

Bilirubin levels haven't gone down, so I will be having the ERCG today at around 3 or 4. I havent been able to have anything by mouth since 5am yesterday, so in addition to the pain from the gall bladder, I am having awful headaches and the pain meds are making me really nauseous, so I am caught in two different catch 22's!! Just wanted to fill you all in. Everyone has been great so far at Emory. I am being taken care of :). Thanks for the prayers, calls, texts, emails, etc. I feel very loved!

expect the unexpected...

2009-08-26T05:18:00.006-05:00

i am writing my 100th post from room hg17 at emory hospital. i came in yesterday around 5 am with excruciating pain in my right side, throwing up, and weak.

i narrowed it down to my gall bladder or appendix after i finally ruled everything else out (gas, acid reflux, irritable tummy, etc etc etc). after a few tests, here is what is up with me:

i have a "loose" gallstone that is headed for my pancreas, which is no good. my bilirubin levels are high, (making me a nice shade of yellow!!) and the doctors are going to monitor my bilirubin levels, and if they go down, it means the "loose" stone has made its way into my small intestine which is what we want. if the levels don't go down, they will do a erpc which is a small light/camera and get the stone out to avoid any danger. then, i am having my gallbladder removed on thursday. so that means i will be here until friday or saturday :(

i have an infection in my bile duct and 12+ gallstones. something is dialated too. ha, have no idea what it is, but it is extremely dialated to a 9. maybe my sphincter? worst pain i have ever had in my life...but they are doing a great job of controlling it. i'm really dehydrated, but they just hung more fluids.

it's all a big mess!! and i have been told so many things that they all run together. so there is a pretty high possibility that i have some of this info twisted, haha!

i should know my bilirubin levels soon. they just came in and drew my blood to run the labs. will keep yall posted.

right now, just pray that:

my bilirubin levels go down
they can do the surgery laproscopically (there is a high change they cant...because of the infection and dialation??)
my pain stays controlled. (getting pretty bad headaches in addition to this because i have been NPO and will stay NPO until after surgery on Thurs, ugh!!)
with a gall bladder attack, it is also hard to get a deep breath, and that is scary!!

i also had a pretty big scare on sunday night, that i would rather not advertise on my blog.

so, it has just been a rough few days here in atlanta...

i am in room hg17 and you can call my cell or email me if you want the room phone number.

honey from the rock

2009-08-23T09:26:00.005-05:00

here are some high points from the past week of being in atlanta...

i am on a high (to say the least) learning curve: new job, city, stage of life, mindset.

i have seen my family more in the past week than i did in months of living in birmingham...and that is a great thing!

i have been working from home/coffee shops this past week...start in the office tomorrow!

i have the convenience of being 15 minutes from downtown, yet can stay away because decatur is pretty self sufficient.

there is a community feel here unlike anywhere else i have ever lived.

i love my place, and i love that i live next door to my office!

city life isn't so bad after all. i actually like it. alot.

i never thought i would like atlanta. actually, i have been known for saying the words "i will NEVER move to atlanta."

never say never.

in all of the chaos of the past few weeks of decisions and packing and moving and goodbye's, i have become even more thankful for the Lord grabbing my attention and unclenching my fist that held so tightly to my plans.

i have said it before and i will say it again, this just feels right.

a verse popped into my head the morning after i got here and it puts feet to my life as i have known it the past year or so:

"...with honey from the rock I would satisfy you..." Psalm 81:16

God truly does give us sweet and life sustaining things from the hardest places.

i know, because i feel like i am experiencing it...

i'm here!

2009-08-17T15:37:00.001-05:00

so far so good!

definitely in transition and a GPS has suddenly become a necessity, but i can't complain about a thing!

paradox...

2009-08-09T18:04:00.002-05:00

"When I get honest,

I admit I am a bundle of paradoxes.

I believe and I doubt,

I hope and get discouraged,

I love and I hate,

I feel bad about feeling good,

I feel guilty about not feeling guilty.

I am trusting and suspicious.

I am honest and I still play games."

-Brennan Manning

to move or not to move?

2009-08-03T18:29:00.004-05:00

after many tears and naps (in the attempts of escaping reality that i had a tough decision to make between 2 very great options), i have settled into a decision.

i am keeping my commitment to go to atlanta!

it just came down to the sobering reality that i was giving my "yes" to an awesome opportunity and "no" to another awesome opportunity. atlanta is still a good move for me for all of the same reasons it was before. there were so many factors in this, and yes, it was a very thought-through decision. yes, nursing school has been my goal for the past 2 years...and i am by no means dying to that. if anything, this has confirmed in my heart that i do want to pursue nursing. just not now. i believe there is a reason i got the acceptance letter 2 days after i accepted the job.

i have doubted (and will probably continue to doubt) my final decision but i am sure that whatever i chose, i would play the "what if" game. being at work today was one of the hardest days i have had working because i was reminded by every delivery, every patient, every conversation that i had with my awesome co-workers that this hospital has my heartbeat.

thanks to all of you for your many emails, facebook messages, texts, and phone calls over the weekend! i am such a lucky girl to have so many great, caring, and loving friends and family!

come see me in atlanta!

is this real?

2009-07-30T20:42:00.008-05:00

(you may need to read my previous post before understanding this one)

i knew this whole process was going way too smooth.

i was leaving for my friend's bachelorette weekend and stopped to get the mail. mistake #1. i had a really thick envelope in there from bevill. (please remember that bevill was my first choice for schools.) i just looked away. "what the &$%#, you have GOT to be kidding me!"

i got in.

so, needless to say i am a mess. i do not know what the Lord is doing here. was he making me let go of my plans to get my heart and attention and now that he has it, is he saying "here you go" (see Psalm 37:4) ??

is this a test of my faith?

it could be a million other things.

i am stuck dead in the middle. i have been back and forth. i am sure i will go back and forth some more. i know i could just do whatever i wanted (and that is be a nurse) but it's not that easy. not when it was a no-brainer when i decided. but then again, i didn't have the option of nursing school. i have NEVER, in this whole process lost sight of wanting to be a nurse. but i thought it just wasn't the time right now.

but maybe it is?

i have to make a decision by august 6, next thursday.

i have 2 great choices in front of me. beats the alternative of having no choices, huh?

i do not want to make God into who i want him to be in all of this. i want to simply see him.

and follow.

with everything i have.

you have my attention...

2009-07-28T12:26:00.006-05:00

"In his heart, a man plans his course, but God determines his steps..."

Proverbs 16:9

Do you believe this? Like really believe this? Because I sure do. Not sure how much of it I have believed until now, to be honest.

You all knew of my plans of going to Nursing School. I have worked and lived in Birmingham for the past 2 years with my goal in mind of being a nurse. I have worked really hard to achieve this goal and although I had a few setbacks last year, I dusted my hands off and picked up where I left off. I was aggressive. I was going to be a nurse, by golly.

I was suposed to start nursing school this fall. I was suposed to work at UAB while in nursing school. But when I got a letter back from Bevill saying I wasn't accepted, it was hard to swallow. "I had a 3.6 GPA!" "I finished all of my pre-reqs!" "I am KATY WATTERS, don't you know me?!?" But I still had Wallace out there. There was still a chance. But I got the same letter from Wallace. Devastated. My goal was starting to look hopeless. And I was getting tired. Tired of working hard and not achieving my goal, tired of not being financially stable, tired and weary. God had my attention regarding nursing school. Finally. And I started to step back. It was obvious he did not want me in nursing school RIGHT NOW. He had something different. But what? I had NO idea! "Do you want me to use my degree in marketing?" "Do you want me to still work towards nursing school in the spring?" "WHAT DO YOU WANT?" I was tired of my plans. They weren't working, obviously.

So I opened my hand and my options. It was wide open. Let's fast forward to last Tuesday. I was at the beach with my brother and his family and decided to leave a day early to drive home and clear my head. (I forgot to mention that the apartment below me had burned to a crisp on Saturday and I had pretty bad smoke damage to my place and to all of my clothes). So I called a friend I hadn't talked to in a month or so and caught her up on my life. I told her I was open to using my degree again and she said "Katy, I know someone looking for a Marketing Director and to do administrative work here in Atlanta! I will give her your name and number!" I honestly gave it no thought. "Me do marketing (and be a good steward of what I have:)?"

Nope. I'm gonna be a nurse, remember?

I don't want to make a long story even longer, so I will leave you with this: I will be working with a Keller Williams real estate agent and a builder in Decatur GA doing all of their marketing work. Their businessees are doing really well and they can't do it all themselves. I will be getting my real estate license at some point, after we get the systems up and running in the office (I am taking the builder from paper files to paperless). This opportunity pursued me, I must say. I found out about it last Tuesday and agreed to work for them yesterday after my interview with them. I already have a place to live...there is a duplex--one side is my office, the other side, my home--how convenient! And I have a roommate! I honestly think that I would be a fool to turn this down. This "move" provides so much....stability, a roommate, there is so much potential to move up with this job, new friends, and a new beginning. I forgot to mention I was able to get out of my lease which is unheard of! I have never been an Atlanta lover, but it's just because of the traffic. (I have gotta get a GPS!)

Yes, I am so tired of moving. Yes, I am so tired of transition. Yes, I will miss the heck out of my co-workers and friends here in Birmingham. YES, I still want to be a nurse. And I want to finish well here, with what God has called me to here. But this move FEELS right, right now. I can look at this situation and see the Lord pursuing me in so many ways. I will not turn my face. Nursing school isn't totally out of the picture. But for now, I want to pursue this and see what is here. Again, it feels right.

I am not sure how I feel just yet. I have been so emotionally exhausted since I found out about the job. But now that I know, I hope to be able to celebrate well! I want to be excited! I want to plan my move! I want to get ready to decorate my place! But I am a hodgepodge of emotions! My last day at work at UAB will be August 13 and I will move on August 15.

"you will hear a voice behind you saying "this is the way , walk in it..."

Isaiah 30:22

"In his heart, a man plans his course, but the Lord determines his steps..."

Proverbs 16:9

...i believe you, Lord....and you have my attention!

...this is the way, walk in it...

2009-07-24T05:50:00.006-05:00

"In returning and rest you shall be saved;

in quietness and in trust shall be your strength.

"But you were unwilling, and you said,"No! We will flee upon horses";

therefore you shall flee away;

and, "We will ride upon swift steeds";

therefore your pursuers shall be swift.

A thousand shall flee at the threat of one;

at the threat of five you shall flee,

till you are left like a flagstaff on the top of a mountain,

like a signal on a hill.

Therefore the LORD waits to be gracious to you,

and therefore he exalts himself to show mercy to you.

For the LORD is a God of justice;

blessed are all those who wait for him.
For a people shall dwell in Zion, in Jerusalem;

you shall weep no more.

He will surely be gracious to you at the sound of your cry.

As soon as he hears it, he answers you.

And though the Lord give you the bread of adversity and the water of affliction,

yet your Teacher will not hide himself anymore,

but your eyes shall see your Teacher.

And your ears shall hear a word behind you, saying,

"This is the way, walk in it,"

when you turn to the right or when you turn to the left.

- Isaiah 30: 16-22

taken

2009-05-30T19:02:00.008-05:00

have you seen this movie?

it really is a great movie for so many reasons.

the whole time a man is pursuing his daughter in what looks like a hopeless situation. but he never gives up. never.

it is a small glimpse into what i believe is our heavenly father's heart for his children.

the best quote is at the end (and i won't ruin if for those who haven't been able to see it) when she looks at him with gratitude, thankfulness, and tears in her eyes and says

"daddy, you came for me!" and he says" i told you i would..." (or something to that effect)

...and that, my friends is exactly what the Lord has done for us. he came for us. and he is coming back for us....all with God's glory in mind.

i get to see them this weekend!

2009-04-27T10:27:00.008-05:00

most of you know how crazy i am about my niece and nephews.

...i get to see all 3 of them this weekend!...

what a treat!

hunter

(loves being outside with whoever will take him! here he is after a "rough day on the farm")

lily and andy

(...after a long day of playing in the sprinklers...)

...they might all be just a "little bit" spoiled by their aunt katy!...

april 25, 2009

2009-04-25T17:15:00.004-05:00

brandie (highfield) and jason wolfe entered into the most sacred of covenants this weekend

...i was so happy to be a part!

...it was such a fun time....for all!

...here are some pics...enjoy!

brandie and her dad

jacksonville girls

traci me heather

stacey and me

the happy couple

tweet tweet?

2009-04-20T19:07:00.003-05:00

so, what's the deal with Twitter?

i mean i have one, so i guess i should say i tweet. but i have no idea what "tweeting" is.

all i know is that i get the weather sent to my phone about every 3 hours because i follow birmingham weather.

and what's the lingo? the @, RT, etc etc.

oh my gosh does this mean i am officially behind on technology?

i've always prided myself on being so "up to date"

funniest. blog post. ever.

2009-03-04T08:44:00.001-06:00

my friend heather has the funniest kids (ok that is an understatement). i babysit them sometimes and there isn't a dull moment. here is a glimpse into her life.

http://cordandheathersachs.blogspot.com/2009/02/conversations-in-passing.html

28 things i love...

2009-03-02T13:01:00.004-06:00

on my 28th birthday, i wanted to list 28 things that i love...or make me who i am...

1. reading my bible, journaling, and watching the today show in the early mornings with coffee

2. being with my niece and nephews

3. accomplishment

4. safety pinning socks together at the toe

5. finding good music on itunes

6. staying on the beach all day long

7. getting cards in the mail

8. learning more about who i am in Christ

9. chats: gmail, facebook, whatever...

10. waking up without an alarm

11. musicals (rent, mamma mia, phantom, hairspray)

12. believing that i will "see the goodness of the Lord in the land of the living..." (Psalm 27:13)

13. grey's anatomy, american idol

14. my job at UAB

15. exercising

16. friends (man, i have some great ones!)

17. organizing, cleaning

18. the church at brook hills

19. standing beside my friends as they say "i do"

20. suprising people

21. clean sheets

22. my eyemask and sound machine (thats more of a necessity!!)

23. my "church family" at grace. y'all will always be that to me

24. learning about the human body (i am so amazed by how intricately and perfectly we are woven together)

25. babysitting

26. target

27. old navy

28. sushi

thanks, friends, for all of the birthday wishes!

y'all are too good to me!!

who knew?

2009-02-18T07:45:00.006-06:00

diet coke was only invented in 1982. (so glad i was born when i was :)

according to suicide statistics, monday is the favored day for self-destruction. ( i believe that...)

it is believed that shakespeare was 46 around the time that the King James Version of the Bible was written. in psalms 46, the 46th word from the first word is shake and the 46th word from the last word is spear. (now who had time to look at this??)

when you die your hair still grows for a couple of months.

...now go share this with your friends...

a little less than a day...

2009-02-09T16:31:00.004-06:00

aimee and carlton (my pastor at grace fellowship) are in china to get their daughter, lily.

it is the FINAL countdown...they have about 24 hours until they hold her in their arms.

can you IMAAGINE??

you can follow their blog here.

let's saturate them in prayer, as many emotions have been and will continue to be exerted.

thank you LORD for this little life and this family's heart for adoption.

my little man

2009-02-05T18:00:00.003-06:00

it's final!

our little man is officially

HUNTER DAVID WATTERS!

hunter,

your aunt katy loves you!

you have brought so much joy to my life just by being you.

you are not even my child,

but you have given me a glimpse into our heavenly father's heart for his children.

and for that, (and so much more...)

i thank you.

provision

2009-01-24T12:12:00.003-06:00

i am anxious, overwhelmed, excited, nervous, apprehensive, etc.

i found out yesterday that there is a spot coming open on my unit at uab.

perfect timing.

guess why?

i get released from dr kirchner on monday!

life has been crazy for me for the past 7 months, but God has proved himself faithful once again. who would have thought that the very week i get released, a spot comes open on the unit that i love??

i am so thankful, of course, yet so taken off guard.

life kind of "begins" again for me...huge change of pace

friends, please pray with me that this job works out (hopefully it will be a daytime position, not nights...will be hard to adjust to nights and go to school) and that i will adjust well to a new routine...

he created me. he knows me. he is interested in me. in you. even my silly little plans. even yours.

hope

2009-01-20T15:16:00.006-06:00

my heart really does long to see Jesus face to face

it manifests itself in so many different ways...some not so pretty...

...i am more convinced now than ever that i was created to stand in the presence of the one who took my place, paid my debt, and gave me life.

...that i was created for more..for something bigger, to enjoy more than just the mundane of this life.

...just something i have not been able to shake lately.

been waiting on this day...

2009-01-13T14:35:00.005-06:00

it's that time.

in september of 2007, i bought tickets to celine dion for january 15, 2009 (i thought it was january 2008, mind you)

i will be there.

red dress. gold shoes. bubbly. the whole nine yards.

Times Square for NYE: Check.

2009-01-01T13:26:00.010-06:00

So I decided to go to Times Square last night for NYE. Alone. Yes, I know, most people wouldn't dare, but I am learning that I do not have a "danger radar". And plus, the Clinton's were there. Heightened security? I would say 40,000 cops is pretty high.

So, I took off to NYC:

I got there and had no idea what to expect:

People. Snow. Everywhere. Frigid Temps. But oh what an experience!!

And then I met some friends: (of course, leave it up to me to meet tons of new friends!)

And I stood in one spot. For HOURS. If you left your spot, for any reason, you could not return. And yes, that means no bathroom. And there were no public bathrooms. Misery. Finally, I gave in and "lost my spot" (only to return) and paid $5 for a cookie just so I could be considered a customer at the Roxy Deli to use their restroom. Best. Investment. Ever.

And I stood there for 9 hours. Count them 9 long hours in the cold. But it was worth it. It got down to 19 degrees. Wind chill: 4 degrees. BURRR!

I looked ridiculous and did not even care. One bit. Some girls had their "party dresses" on. Not me. I wish I had my "party sweatpants" on.

Lionel Richie. Taylor Swift. Katy Perry. Ludacris. Jonas Brothers. The Clintons. Carson Daly. Katie Couric. And little ole' me. It was truly the experience of a lifetime!

Happy 2009, friends!

How do you measure, measure a year?

2008-12-30T15:02:00.004-06:00

If you know me, you know how much I LOVE RENT!
525,600 minutes...that consisted of...

2 surgeries...
4 moves...
An abrupt, unexpected ending to a dearly loved job...
A dear part of my family and piece of my heart taken away just 8 short days after she was born...
Getting a glimpse into being a nomad...

A new nephew...
A family who, unhesitatingly, opened their home and lives to me...
A new church home...
New friends...
Three of my closest friends marrying their best friends...
Learning to ENJOY walking with God...

It was definitely a refining year for me. God is changing me. I am no longer the same. He has loosened my grip on this world and the plans I have for me and slowly wedged in himself, and I am learning to embrace it.
Thank you, Lord for your commitment to me.
Thank you for not giving up. on me. on us.

Isn't there anybody who can tell me what Christmas is all about ?

2008-12-24T09:49:00.006-06:00

Immanuel- "God with us"

..."fullness of God in helpless babe." - In Christ Alone

..."word of the Father, now in flesh appearing" - O Come all ye Faithful

"Have this mind among yourselves, which is yours in Christ Jesus, who, though he was in the form of God, did not count equality with God a thing to be grasped, but made himself nothing, taking the form of a servant, being born in the likeness of men"

Philippians 2:5-7

"And it came to pass in those days, that there went out a decree from Caesar Augustus, that all the world should be taxed. (And this taxing was first made when Cyre'ni-us was governor of Syria.) And all went to be taxed, every one into his own city. And Joseph also went up from Galilee, out of the city of Nazareth, into Judea, unto the city of David, which is called Bethlehem, (because he was of the house and lineage of David,) to be taxed with Mary his espoused wife, being great with child. 6 And so it was, that, while they were there, the days were accomplished that she should be delivered. And she brought forth her firstborn son, and wrapped him in swaddling clothes, and laid him in a manger; because there was no room for them in the inn. And there were in the same country shepherds abiding in the field, keeping watch over their flock by night. And, lo, the angel of the Lord came upon them, and the glory of the Lord shone round about them; and they were sore afraid. And the angel said unto them, Fear not: for, behold, I bring you good tidings of great joy, which shall be to all people. For unto you is born this day in the city of David a Saviour, which is Christ the Lord. And this shall be a sign unto you; Ye shall find the babe wrapped in swaddling clothes, lying in a manger. And suddenly there was with the angel a multitude of the heavenly host praising God, and saying, Glory to God in the highest, and on earth peace,good will toward men. Luke 2

" And that is what Christmas is all about Charlie Brown."

Merry Christmas, friends. God IS with us...

I Was Tagged...

2008-11-25T08:04:00.002-06:00

I was tagged by Julie Ammons. According to the tagging rules, I am suposed to post the fourth photo from the fourth photo on my computer. Well, most of you know Anna Lee Haynes (soon to be Weathers). I am a bridesmaid in her wedding on December 13 and I am putting together a slideshow for them for their rehearsal dinner. The fourth picture from the fourth folder on my computer just happens to be one that is going in their slideshow. Hilarious!

But how appropriate for the Thanksgiving holiodays. I couldnt be more thankful for this family. They have literally taken me in as a "sister". I feel so loved, embraced, cared for, and fought for by this entire family. I can't do it justice on a blog post, but Haynes family...I couldn't be more thankful to God for you. Thank you for showing me unconditional love.

I am tagging Mallory, Bethany, Kirbey, and Jessica.

Extreme Makeover?

2008-11-04T23:26:00.006-06:00

I've been silent instead of speaking up

Gave my advice instead of giving love

I have been unfair, faithless and unkind

I have shut my eyes just so I would stay blind

It's not what I meant to do

'Cause I wanna honor you

Make me over, make me new

Make me a mirror, a reflection of you

Take me all apart

Take me to your heart and pull me closer

Oh, Jesus, make me over

Take away the pride that whispers in the dark

Take the stone out of the middle of my heart

Hidden underneath my insecurities

Is the servant that you've destined me to be

But day after precious day

I get in my own way

I am only made of your imagining

I'm dust and clay on the wind

Wash me in the river of your sacrifice

Until I'm changed, purified

Take me all apart

Take me to your heart and pull me closer

My Jesus, make me over

Make me over

What sweet, honest lyrics. And if you know me, you know I play songs on repeat until I can't listen to them anymore. Currently playing: "Make Me Over" by Natalie Grant

Agenda?

2008-10-02T07:56:00.000-05:00

Alot of you have asked "What do you do with all of your time?" So here is a rundown...

Between 8 and 9am - I wake up and it takes me a bit to get focused and get into the living room, as crutches kinda make it a little hard. Watch TV (Today Show), drink coffee (if I feel like hopping on one foot w coffee in my hand!), and usually blog.

10-12ish- Read! I am reading "Twilight" and "A Chance to Die" and doing a precept Bible Study, so I definitely have time for all of that.

noonish- Mom comes home and makes me lunch. Yall, I am so spoiled at home. Look at this picture of how my mom brings my sandwich to me. And a side note: She is awesome. I seriously do not know what I would do without my mom. It has been great just to enjoy all the time that I can with her, and be a part of her daily life for the past 2 weeks. I love you mom!

1:00-3:00 - usually nap, catch up on emails and phone calls

Evenings are usually hanging out with my family, reading, sitting outside (weather is BEAUTIFUL!), showering (this is a huge event these days!!), or going places (of course nowhere strenuous)

8pm- go to bed. You think I'm joking? (It is actually 9pm Eastern time)I am at the mercy of my mom to help me get situated in bed with all of the things I need. Plus, I can watch TV and do whatever I need in my room. So I go to bed when she says! Haha!

Then I usually find another TV show to watch or read more or pray and journal until I fall asleep. And the viscous cycle starts up again the next day! Gotta love life with my poor casted leg!

And you see that is it propped up. I have this blue wedge like thing that keeps my foot above my heart to prevent swelling. It is always propped!

There have been a few things that have been "big events" such as my dad's company picnic (pictures below)

The whole fam at the picnic

Hunter on his first pony ride. We gotta get him a new bib!

Lily. She's my girl!

Andy was sick that day, but he wanted his "Unka Kate Tate" Yes, he calls me "uncle"

Hope some of you get a kick (no pun intended!) out of this! I am leaving tomorrow to head back to Alabama (to the Haynes) and will be back in Birmingham on Monday for my post-op appointment where I hope to get my cast off and stitches out!

And tonight I will DEFINITELY be watching the VP debate. I will admit, I am a little nervous.

Laminin

2008-09-30T08:29:00.007-05:00

Laminin is the major non-collagenous component of the basal lamina, such as those on which cells of an epithelium sit. Laminin is a protein found in the "extracellular matrix", the sheets of protein that form the substrate of all internal organs also called the "basement membrane".

Ok that was your biology lesson for today. :)

Let me continue....

Laminin is vital to making sure overall body structures hold together.

Laminin hold us together, moleucularly. It is the protein binding structure that gives us the correct shape and form. Without this, it can lead to a form of muscular dystrophy. It is vital. We must have laminin. Wouldn't you agree? From a medical standpoint, it amazes me. I want to show you something that will, perhaps, blow you away. Here is the diagram of laminin.

and here is the actual laminin molecule...

Does this blow you away like it did me? The very core of our existence is held together by a molecule shaped like a cross?! It is no accident, my friends. The God who KNEW me before the foundations of the world, before Adam and Eve ever uttered a word, has created laminin to show his glory. I am so convicted of how I do not consider the cross in my daily life. It is at the center of who I am. Louie Giglio has a YouTube video on this.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_e4zgJXPpI4

"He is the image of the invisible God, the firstborn over all creation. For by him all things were created: things in heaven and on earth, visible and invisible, whether thrones or powers or rulers or authorities; all things were created by him and for him. He is before all things, and in him all things hold together. And he is the head of the body, the church; he is the beginning and the firstborn from among the dead, so that in everything he might have the supremacy. For God was pleased to have all his fullness dwell in him, and through him to reconcile to himself all things, whether things on earth or things in heaven, by making peace through his blood, shed on the cross."

Colossians 1:15-20

And The Name is...

2008-09-29T08:55:00.002-05:00

Julio!

I have just recently become an Alabama fan, and since it was suggested to name my tendon Julio for Julio Jones, I took it into consideration. I became a fan when I went to last year's Arkansas game. I fell in love with the traditions, atmosphere, intensity, and fan's loyalty. It was amazing! Plus, I had 50 yd line tickets! So, Saturday, I texted a few people during the AL GA game and told them if we won, I would name my tendon Julio. And Boy did we win?! This guy is a freshman Wide reciever and he is awesome. Watch the video below of some of his highlights. Who wouldn't want their tendon to be named after him?

He is building a palace...

2008-09-26T11:41:00.005-05:00

“Imagine yourself as a living house. God comes in to rebuild that house. At first, perhaps, you understand what He is doing. He is getting the drains right, and stopping the leaks in the roof, and so on: you knew that those jobs needed doing and you are not surprised. But presently He starts knocking the house about in a way that hurts abominably, and does not seem to make sense. What on earth is He up to?
The explanation is that He is building quite a different house from the one you thought of– throwing out a new wing here, putting on an extra floor there, running up towers, making courtyards. You thought you were going to be made into a decent little cottage: but He is building a palace. He intends to come and live in it Himself.”
–C. S. Lewis, Mere Christianity (London: William Collins, 1970), 172.

This quote is so comforting to me. It is a reminder that I am not in control, that things may not always go as I would like or as I have planned (boy, don't I believe that?!), and that God is truly intimate with me. He is doing something that we cannot see -- it's the bigger picture. Friends, we can rest in the knowledge of God. We can rest in his wisdom, goodness, and patience with us, even in our craziest times.

Most of you that I have talked to are going through hard things. They are real life issues. My desire is that we throw off the burden of trying to figure it all out and watch God build our palace...

Name that Tendon!

2008-09-24T10:06:00.010-05:00

I am already bored. Oh dear, what a long 2 weeks this is gonna be. Atleast Grey's Anatomy comes on tonight...AND I started reading the "Twilight Series". But I have had a few hours this morning to think...about so many things. In no order...

1) of the many things I take advantage of with my health. Simple things like walking to the kitchen to get coffee, standing up to shower, shaving my leg (which I normally consider a burden, but its really a luxury:), even sitting with my legs crossed is impossible!

2) that "tendons" really do matter. I have read and studied the body of Christ, but now I see the importance of even the seemingly smaller parts, such as "tendons" now. My tendon wasn't functioning properly, and it has re-shaped my whole way of living. That is the same in the body of Christ. We really do help each other, even if it seems small and insignificant, and often overlooked. We work together. This small part of my body not working right has taken me out of "normal living"...for months.

3) that even the smallest word or warming facial expression can gear a whole lot. Tuesday, I had several nurses, and when someone was personal with me, got to know me, asked questions, smiled, and truly cared, I was at ease. But if they were just "doing their job", I was not comforted. That's just a bit to take with me as I enter the field myself.

Ok, so now for the fun part, the part where you, my blog friends help me out....

LET'S NAME MY TENDON!

Since I now have somebody else's body part in me, I want to embrace it.

Thank you Anna Lee for this idea!

There are several things we need to do...

1) identify if it is a girl or boy tendon

2) name it

3) give reasons why you named it what you named it

4) what is the story behind it? (you can come up with a fun little crazy story or whatever!)

OK, this should give all of you working people out there something fun to do and you mom's a little break from the kiddo's. I will definitely be excited to hear what you all come up with!

Dead Man Walking?

2008-09-23T20:37:00.002-05:00

The surgery went well, and I am at home with my mom taking great care of me! (She is the best nurse!) The block they did in my leg didn’t last near as long as it did last time. My last surgery, the block didn’t wear off until the following evening, (didn’t even have to take any pain medicine until that next night) but this time, I could already feel it when I woke up IN THE OPERATING ROOM. Yes, I woke up just as they were finishing my surgery! So, they gave me morphine to help control the pain and it just made me nauseous.

Dr Kirchner said that when he went in to “repair” my tendon, on the spot where he last operated was doing great, but it had completely ruptured (torn into 2 pieces) on another location of that same tendon. I guess all those years of basketball and softball caught up with it:). Sooo….he replaced my tendon with a cadaver’s tendon. He said this would almost guarantee no more problems. So yeah I am a dead man (or woman?) walking! (Well, not technically walking yet...but soon to be!)

I am in a good bit of pain and pretty nauseous tonight but really thankful that Dr. Kirchner was able to take care of it. Thanks for the calls, texts, voicemails, and facebook messages. I am one lucky girl to have so many people that love her as much as you all do!

To catch you up...

2008-09-23T19:00:00.000-05:00

Janet White suggested I do "Katy's life in bullet points". And it is such a good idea, since many of you are lost on what is going on with me (understandably so!). And to be honest, I am fighting bits of insecurity and embarrassment as my life unfolds with all the changes and un-settledness. But if I believe the truth that God really is in control and he is a good shepherd, I must rejoice and know that this is his plan for me.

- was taken out of work by my Doc on June 5 (torn tendon and fracture)

- surgery on July 8

- 2 weeks later, got an infection on the incision on foot

- got accepted to Nursing School at Snead State, decided to move from Birmingham to cut down driving time

- moved in with the Haynes

- moved to Jacksonville to take over a friends lease

- Aug 19, the day before classes started, had to have root canal (unexpectedly)

- decided that keeping my insurance at UAB was more important than starting Nursing School RIGHT NOW, so dropped my classes and decided to just drive to Birmingham to work 3x a week

- living a FAIRLY normal life...and went to physical therapy on August 28 and tendon re-snapped, which threw my plans, once again, out the window. I had gotten a letter in the mail saying I would have to start paying $350/month for insurance if I didnt return back to work by September 25. That wasn't happening...because on September 10, the Doc was able to read my MRI and said my tendon was torn again...and by torn he meant totally seperated.

- In the meantime, on September 12, I moved BACK to Birmingham (because my whole life was in Birmingham, just not me physically)

- UAB can no longer hold my job because I have met my 16 week maximum medical leave time. That really stinks, because if you have talked to me, you know how much I loved that job.

- Also found out that my insurance will no longer be $350/month, because I am eligible for long term disability, which means I will pay the employee rate and be paid a portion of what I would be making if I were working.

- And now to catch you up, I had surgery on my foot again, now recovering in GA for 2 weeks. Now, you can start reading the blog post titled "Dead Man Walking"

Through all of this, I am seeing that the Lord is personal. He is being just, he is being kind, he is disciplining me, and he really is after ME. Not just the parts I offer. He wants my complete surrender. Even my dreams of being a nurse right now. I am not physically able to work towards that goal. I have days when I really believe that and can hold onto that, and days when nothing is further from the truth in my mind. But, truth stands. God is God. His gospel isn't threatened by my moods or doubts.

I do want to get back to living a somewhat normal life. (I am beginning to wonder what that even means?) But I want to look back over these few months and see that my faith was tested and approved, that I handled small trials with hope, and that I trusted that my Heavenly Father to carve out this path for me long before the foundations of the world. I want to make this time count.

Going Under the Knife...

2008-09-22T18:07:00.004-05:00

I spent most of my day at UAB doing pre-op today. The doctor said he would do one of two things tomorrow:

1) repair my tendon with stitches

or

2) fuse my 2 tendons in my feet together

So, just wanted to update you, my friends. I have to be there at 8:30 am tomorrow. I'm not too concerned about the surgery, just the inconvenience of recovery. I am going to make every effort to "not waste my recovery time", so I will probably be blogging, reading, praying, and seeking the Lord ALOT.

Please feel free to call, email, come to GA, whatever :).

I am on the books...for surgery

2008-09-17T18:16:00.002-05:00

Had an interview Monday, didn't get a good vibe from it. It's way up in the air. Gotta take care of my foot, so I called to schedule my surgery and it is going to be Tuesday. They want to take care of it right away, especially since my insurance rates are about to sky rocket.

I have mixed feelings about it. I am ready to move forward. With life, with my foot, school, a job, everything. My spirits go from lifted to dropped very easily. Today its a "dropped" kind of day. I don't feel settled or at home in my new place as of yet, surgery is coming up and I know and remember what the recovery was like, I'm just unsettled.

Friends, your prayers are coveted.

9/11

2008-09-11T08:32:00.005-05:00

Do y'all remember when you were when you heard about the World Trade Center being hit?

I can remember being in stats lab at JSU, and my friend telling me about it and me not thinking it was a big deal. I thought it was an accidental plane crash. Then, I got home from class and my brother, Kip, told me to "get off the computer and watch the news because the biggest thing that would probably happen in my life was going on".

I watched it the rest of the day.

And 7 years later, I am still amazed. This has to be the most emotional day in modern history, year after year.

So, leave a comment...where were you?

Unique

2008-09-11T00:16:00.003-05:00

Lord, my life is crazy and exhausting, and for your glory. And I am unable to express my gratitude to you for it. (Taken from my friend, Sherry's blog!)

You know, the more I have sat around and talked to the benefits people until I am blue in the face today, the more I see that my life has been carved out for me. What an amazing God we serve that he would make us all unique, with different stories that make up who we are...we all have our "issues", but God has literally fashioned all of our days. He is able to be trusted even when he gives us just enough light for the step we are on, even though we want the whole staircase lit up.

I am trying to deal with insurance details now about my potential surgery, which by the way, I am almost positive that surgery is my best option. So if you think about it , please pray that I would wait on the Lord, that I would have an abundance of patience and have wisdom. I only have 14 days to get things settled because my 16 week medical leave is up on the 25th.

That dreaded call...

2008-09-10T10:33:00.006-05:00

Got the dreaded phone call this morning from my orthopaedic doctor. They were able to see what they wanted on the MRI and I do have a tear in my tendon again. I have 2 options: 1)get casted and be immobilized for weeks and after those weeks, re-evaluate to see if the tendon healed itself, and if not, operate and 2) go straight into surgery. The doctor recommends surgery.

I was taken off guard completely because I thought it was OK.

But in hindsight, I can see how the Lord has protected me lately. This didn't happen apart from his wisdom. He has fully known my days and is acquainted with all of my ways.

I still have so many questions to ask, so I haven't made up my mind completely. Just pray for me as I move this week and for wisdom in knowing what to do. Thanks my friends!

I am moving to Birmingham

2008-09-07T15:23:00.005-05:00

You read it right. I am moving again. 3 times in a month.

Due to unforseen and uncontrollable circumstances, I am moving back to Birmingham. I will be living with a couple who have so graciously opened their home and lives to me. I met them on Thursday and it is incredible how I really feel like I saw the face of God in it all. He made it so clear that I needed to move that I couldn't even question it. I go to school and PT in Birmingham. When they release me to go back to work, my job in in Birmingham. Now that I am not in Nursing School and didnt get the job at Struts, I do nothing in Jacksonville. Except go to church. And I will definitely miss my church...

I feel like my circumstances have clouded me from remembering that the Lord really does hear his children even in their "dark clouds". It seems like just when I thought things couldnt get alot worse (as far as finances and my poor foot were concerned), the Lord literally gave me "more than I could ask or imagine". I don't undertstand what all has gone on in my life the past few months...but now that I look back, there is really no telling what the Lord was protecting me from or just waiting to give me. Wait on the Lord...

I am NOT excited about loading my car up and having to physically move again...especially with a hurt foot! But I am excited about a new beginning. I am anxious to see what God has for me!

I have been clinging to this verse and wanted to share it with you all...

Psalm 27:13-14

I believe that I shall look upon the goodness of the Lord in the land of the living!
Wait for the Lord;be strong, and let your heart take courage; wait for the Lord!

Sarah Palin

2008-09-03T22:33:00.004-05:00

So who watched the RNC? I think McCain was brilliant in his choice to pick her as a running mate. She brings a whole new dynamic to the ticket. I am pretty sure I just decided who to vote for in 2008!

Go McCain/Palin!

What do you guys out there think?

And who noticed the youngest daughter (Piper) waving like it was her job?!?!

Glimmer*

2008-08-31T22:59:00.003-05:00

"Christian joy is the greatest when the cross is heaviest..."

When it Rains, It Pours...

2008-08-29T18:34:00.004-05:00

Today I went to physical therapy and it went NOTHING like I expected. I got there and the FIRST exercise I did, my foot popped. And when I say pop, I mean like the office ladies heard it across the room. I immediately went down with the pain and my therapist got me up and started icing it and went to page my ortho doctor. My therapist had no idea what had happened. The terror in her face kinda freaked me out even more. I sat there crying, playing things over and over in my head while we waited on him to call. She was ready to send me to the ER when my MD called her back. He said for me to come home and ice it for the weekend and if it continued to hurt, to call next week and come in to see him. I left in a wheelchair and with crutches. 2 steps forward and 6 back.

Guys I am asking you to pray. This puts even more kinks in my plans with living in Jacksonville and needing to work in Birmingham, along with my insurance saga.

I am spending the weekend with my leg wrapped from toe to knee, iced down. It concerns me that it is in a different spot than my other tendon tear. I am reminded that I know my creator who knew me before he formed me. None of this is a surprise to him. You can also pray for a lifted spirit. Thanks blog friends!

Through the Years...

2008-08-25T17:17:00.003-05:00

OK if you need a good laugh, please go to this website: http://www.yearbookyourself.com/

I love it. You put your picture in and it takes you through what you would have looked like different years.

Defining...

2008-08-20T11:04:00.005-05:00

I am giving new meaning to the name of my blog "Organized Chaos".

Right now I should be on my way to Boaz for my first day of Nursing School, but yesterday changed that.

I went to the dentist and had to have a root canal (unknowingly, mind you)....so suuuuuper short version to a long, drawn out story: I need insurance. I must keep my job at UAB for that purpose.

So, I was looking at: working at UAB 3 days a week, School 5 days, Physical Therapy 1 day. Add 'em up. That is 9 days. I need 9 days in my week. Not gonna work. SO I had to make a tough decision and delay (not forsake) Nursing School...I withdrew from the program. Insurance is my top need right now.

It was a hard day and I shed many tears, but I am thankful that I serve a God who is in complete control. I don't always see or understand that, especially when my wants don't line up with his will. But I am making a choice to trust him. It's not exactly coming natural, it's a fight. I am just consumed with seeing what the Lord is doing. He has been after me and has me now...unclenched fist and all. He is opening my hand to accept his good and perfect plan for my life. And as I have thought about it, I do need rest.

So here is my new life: (as of today, August 20, 2008) I will be working at Strut's (they called- yay!) here. As soon as I am released to return to UAB I will work there 3 days a week and schedule my time/work here around that. I will still be living in Jacksonville.

Sometimes, life just throws us curveballs, aka defining moments.

And I am thankful for my friends and family who are patient with me through it all.

36265

2008-08-16T23:00:00.004-05:00

Would it surprise you if I said I moved again? Well please don't let it. Because I did. I am living back in Jacksonville. Whew, let me breathe!

I feel like God has been pursuing me so much lately. For so long while I was in Birmingham, especially at the end, I would think "I will really go hard after the Lord when I move, I am so busy right now, there's not much time...or I will be better with my money when I move....or I will start really exercising when I move.....oh the endless amounts of things I was gonna change! That is definitely not what the Lord wanted. Last week, I overdrew my checking account by a SIGNIFICANT amount. I lived out of my car, so fast food was my life. My foot isn't ready to exercise. I feel like my plan to change almost everything I have said I would has not been successful, but daily, I have had to fall on my face before the Lord. He wants me. Not just my surrender of what I choose to give him.

Also...I am trying to learn what it means to be a single lady in a married world. I really want my single life to count. I don't want to wish it away by being discontent and crying over wanting a husband all of the time. Sure, I want to be married, but I have been given the gift of singleness right now...so I want it to matter.

Nursing school starts this week! I am sure I will have more to say as the semester goes on...

Please pray with me that I get a job at Strut's in Jacksonville. I moved here banking on getting this job. Hopefully they call this week!

ESFJ

2008-08-06T13:44:00.003-05:00

I took the Myers-Briggs test for the millionth time today (bored while the baby I am keeping was sleeping) and it says that I am an ESFJ. Extroverted, Sensing, Feeling, and Judging. I am known and the "helper". Here are a few lines to describe who I am. See if you agree.

does not like being alone
thinks life has purpose/meaning,
organized
outgoing
social
does not like strange people/things - likely intolerant of differences
open, easy to read
values relationships and families over intellectual pursuits
group oriented
follows the rules
affectionate
planner
regular
orderly
clean
finisher
religious
consults others before acting
content
positive
loves getting massages
complimentary
dutiful
loving
considerate

ESFJ's are extremely sensitive to the feelings of others, which makes them perhaps the most sympathetic of all the types, but which also leaves them somewhat self-conscious, that is, highly sensitive to what others think of them. Loving and affectionate themselves, they need to be loved in return. In fact, ESFJ's can be crushed by personal criticism, and are happiest when given ample appreciation both for themselves personally and for the tireless service they give to others.

I think it's pretty accurate. Let me re-phrase that. It nailed me. What do y'all think?

Just the 4 of us...

2008-07-28T09:33:00.003-05:00

I am reading the controversial fiction book "The Shack" and without recommending the book, (still reading it...don't want to jump the gun!) I want to share a quote. This basic plot is a man is confronted with the trinity. I will not tell you how the trinity reveals themselves to Mack, the main character as that is an important part. But I do want to share this. Mack is talking to the God character "Papa" after Mack sees the way the trinity interacts together. They are three people yet interact as one. Mack says that it would be hard for us humans to do that, which I agree.

Listen to what Papa, the God character says in response.

"We're asking you to do it with us. Mack we want to share with you the love and joy and freedom and light that we already know within ourself. We created you, the human, to be in face-to-face relationship with us, to join our circle of love. As difficult as it will be for you to understand, everything that has taken place is occurring exactly according to this purpose, without violating choice or will"

Wow. God asks us to have a relationship with him as he does with his son. So often, I see myself as someone who is "lost in the crowd" of Christians. But I matter. I am important to God. As important as Jesus is. Think about it. We all are, if we are in Christ. That blows my mind.

It is amazing how God can use a work of fiction to help us to understand who he is more.

This Little Guy...

2008-07-15T20:40:00.001-05:00

...has impacted me more than he will ever know. By that I mean...I have struggled for YEARS to believe God's love for me. What kind of love, the depth of it, the intensity of it, etc. It is just something I have always struggled with. It is something I have always known as a believer and have even taught to the girls I have discipled but has always been a struggle for me to believe.

Hunter became a part of my family on March 1. This little guy has given me more of a glimpse into the heart of Christ every time I am around him. I often think "where would he be if he werent with us?" He has already been on 2 vacations and he is only 5 months old. He is adored by everyone he comes in contact with. He has a nice place to call home, and special people to call "mommy" and "daddy". He has all of his needs met and EXCEEDED, and to be honest, the little booger is spoiled rotten. He is getting opportunities now that he is adopted that he wouldn't get if he wasn't. He will have the opportunity to go to college if he wants. His future is wide open. Time with him never gets old. Things around us fade when he is there. We rejoiced on the day we got him! His dad thinks he is just awesome...the coolest thing in the world. Even when he's grouchy and whiny, I want to hold him and rock him to sleep. When he goes to sleep I can't wait for him to wake up and look at me, smile and be ready to play! He's just special. In a sense, he was saved from earthly "hell". He has a new life.

You see, the "little guy" I described is me!! I am adopted! I get so many opportunities now that I didn't as a nonbeliever. I get to know my Jesus. I am in a safe place. I am taken care of. My Father is someone who is CRAZY about me! All of my needs are met. I can go to sleep at night knowing my future is secure. I am adopted, not into an earthly family, but a heavenly realm. There was rejoicing going on when Jesus called me to the Father and moved my heart to repentance!

I like to call moments like this "glory moments". Moments when I catch tidbits of God's glory.

And all too often, I am not thankful for this.

Daddy, please forgive me for not believing your untameable love for me. Thank you for calling me your daughter!! Thank you for this gift of Hunter to show me the love you have for me.

Thanks Hunter David Watters!

Life Lessons...

2008-07-11T16:13:00.000-05:00

I loved Juno. It was just such a cute movie. I cried...possibly because adoption is so dear to me...but nonetheless, I cried. I didn't even cry during the Notebook, but I did at Juno!! And as I watched it, I caught a few quotes that rang true with me.

This is ridiculously redeeming...

"Somebody is going to find a precious blessing from Jesus in this garbage dump of a situation."

As I am growing older, I see how true this is:

"I never realize how much I like being home unless I’ve been somewhere really different for a while."

And the quote that I feel like sums out my life and my efforts of trying to "figure myself out"...

"I don’t know what kind of girl I am."

Thanks, Juno!

It's HUGE...

2008-07-08T21:34:00.000-05:00

If I have talked to you lately, you probably know that my anxiety about the surgery hasn't been coming from the surgery itself, but from the cast and crutches. That is what I was so worried about. Not anesthesia, not pain. Cast and crutches. And now I see why. Casts are so inconvenient. I can't lay out in the sun (one of my favorite things to do!!), I have betadine on my foot, they make you weight atleast 20 lbs more, and they are claustrophobic. I am so vain.

So I posted a picture.

Day one and I am feeling fine...it is still numb (because of the block they gave me) Day 2 could be a totally different story cause the feeling should be back.

Funny Story (and I am sure many more are to come)...When I got to GA, I had to go up some steps to get into my parents house. So I walked up to them, stood there for a good 2 minutes, wondering "how in the WORLD am I gonna do this?" Mom got so tickled that she almost peed herself. So finally I dropped my crutches and hopped up the steps.

Long Time No Blog

2008-07-02T11:38:00.001-05:00

Most of you already know that my brother and sister-in-law were adopting a little girl who was due to be born on June 30. She was actually born on June 19 weighing a whopping 7 lbs and 14 oz. They were there for the whole experience, hospital, labor room, everything. On Saturday June 21 they proudly took Caroline Ella Watters to her new home in Cedartown. With private adoptions, the birth mom has 10 days from the day they sign all official paperwork to change her mind. 8 days into us enjoying and loving on our new little addition, we got the dreaded phone call from the lawyer. The birth mom wanted her back. So, needless to say our family is taking this hard.

For all of you out there who will, please pray for the heartache we are going through through this loss. Pray for Kyle and Shannon as they pick up pieces of what was once there and now taken away.

There are lots of emotions and things I am experiencing. I never thought I would bond with an infant as much as I did Caroline. I stayed up so many nights with her while I was home, just to give my brother and sister-in-law a rested start with 2 babies. Its an instant connection. I think I caught a tiny glimpse into how much mothers love their children and how they would do ANYTHING for them.

As I posted not long ago, I applied to Nursing School at 5 different places. Well I got letters back and got a big fat "NO" from them all, besides Snead State. I applied to both RN and LPN and got accepted into LPN.

I also have a torn tendon and a fractured foot, and the doctors have decided that surgery is my plan of care to reconstruct my tendon and set my bone. Surgery is scheduled for July 8 at UAB. It is outpatient, and I will be in a cast and crutches for 4 weeks (Any suggetions on what color I should get the cast? Anyone wanna sign it??) Then the ole boot goes back on and I start PT.

Needless to say, I am out of work and out of an income. I will be staying with my second family- The Haynes for a while till I can get on my feet again (literally and financially). SO.. that means I will be able to go to my church again! I cannot wait to be back with those people.

This is the very short version to so much that is going on in my life right now. Sorry for the lack of details. I am emotionally challenged right now so it is really hard to get thoughts together.

A Little of What I am Reading..

2008-06-04T17:23:00.000-05:00

I am reading "Abba's Child" by Brennan Manning. Just wanted to share a quote from the book with you all.

"Come to me now, Jesus says. Acknowledge and accept who I want to be for you: a Savior of boundless compassion, infinite patience, unbearable forgiveness, and love that keeps no score of wrongs. Quit projecting onto me your own feelings about yourself. At this moment your life is a bruised reed and I will not crush it, a smoldering wick and I will not quench it. You are in a safe place. "

God, help me to believe this!!

The Goal...

2008-05-28T10:30:00.000-05:00

Well, I have officially applied to all of the Nursing Schools that I intend on for the Fall. I have heard a response of "no" from Bevill State. I am still waiting on the other 4 (Snead, Wallace, CACC, and Lawson).

I have worked myself up about getting accepted so much! It has become what I work towards and I am lost in the shuffle. I have been convicted about how I am so anxious about the goal (getting into Nursing School) that I have failed to enjoy the things God is teaching me and showing me along the way. It seems like the end is so enticing and the pathway to geth there so hard and long and full of trials. After I submitted all of my applications yesterday, I felt like it was my way of surrendering this idol to the Lord. It's in his hands. I am at the mercy of his providence and I cannot thwart his plan. It felt nice to do that.

An Apple a Day?...

2008-04-29T11:51:00.000-05:00

So, I had a doctor's appointment this morning with a new doc. (Nothing new-- just a check up for my PCOS)

This new doctor (a endocrinologist/reprodction specialist at Kirklin Clinic at UAB) basically contradicted everything my last doctor said. He upp'ed the dosage of my medicine (saying there was NO WAY that the dosage I was on was beneficial), he ripped me off the low carb diet (I am not complaining about this one), and told me my last doctor was like a "little boy with a hammer -- thinking he always needed to fix something". Wow. Not something you want to hear about a doctor who did SURGERY on you 6 months ago.

I am still a runner. Day 2. :)

So, you wanna be a runner?

2008-04-27T17:48:00.000-05:00

I have said it forever. I want to be a runner. I went to the Nashville marathon last year and came back SOOO motivated to run. My body needs exercise and I want to run and like it!!

But I absolutely hate running. Problem? Yes!

But everyone I have talked to that runs now hated it at one point like myself. They all say "I don't LOVE running, but I love the feeling I get when I am finished!" So what makes me different? I guess I could try it out.

Any runners out there that want to offer up some advice? Fresh tunes for my iPod? Ways to get started? Anything would be helpful!

By the way, I am starting tomorrow :)

My Nature...

2008-04-20T10:50:00.000-05:00

My heart is a sinful, sinful place. I am convinced that I have ..."fallen short of the glory of God."

Lately, I have consistently been reminded of this truth (that I am sinful) but stopping there, not going on. Not remembering that I am forgiven, not remembering that I am HIS, not remembering that I am redeemed and made new by the creator.

It is so true that we must "talk to ourselves" instead of "listen to ourselves". You turn into a mess.

My heart's desire is that I live from who God has made me...from the truths that he speaks about me in his son, and not from my old self.

Things I Love...Round One

2008-04-15T11:54:00.001-05:00

I am gonna make this a running post and just add to it as I think of things I love...

1. Mornings to sit and drink coffee. Oh how I love these!

2. Learning new things about the human body. I am learning so much about how intricately our bodies were woven together in our mother's wombs (Psalm 139:14-15). Did you know that there are special kinds of cells that stretch to make up our bladders so that we can hold our urine? Cool, huh? AND to think...those cells are in the perfect place to create the perfect organ to do its job so that we don't pee on ourselves all the time! Random, I know, but it gives me a new view on God as my creator. And to see those newborn babies be born and function properly. It blows my mind! Not only is God creator, but he is involved in the smallest cells of our being.

3. Zoe's. Enough said.

4. Neosporin. Y'all, I have to be the most accident prone human alive. I burned my arm in 2 places and took a nose dive in a parking lot WHILE AT WORK within 2 weeks of each other. So, I really have a new appreciation for Neosporin.

5. Days off. I used to get so bored when I didnt have things lined up for me to do. But now, I love it. I feel like I have learned to relax and appreciate things. And people. And places. It feels good.

6. Words of Affirmation. But who doesn't? Sometimes we just all need to hear that we are important, appreciated, and loved.

He is Ours!

2008-04-03T15:58:00.000-05:00

As alot of you know, my brother has had a foster baby since he was 2 weeks old. It is such a sad story. Follow this link. http://news.mywebpal.com/partners/680/public/news882252.html

Kyle and Shannon have, with no success, been trying to have a baby since 2001. They had IVF, had a miscarriage, and been so frustrated. They have been trying to adopt for a while now. All the while, they have kept an amazing attitude.

On March 1, my brother (Kyle) called me at 7am crying like a baby to tell me that they got a litle boy. It has been an absolute roller coaster of emotions for Kyle and Shannon since then. Everyday they wonder if the DFACS (department of family and children's services) is gonna call to take our "little Buddy" away. We all knew there was a chance that he could be taken away and placed with some of his family. But still, they had a great attitude. They would say "We really want to keep him, because we feel like he is ours...but if we don't....SOMEONE has to take care of this baby right now, so we will give him a good home. Atleast he is safe with us." So for over a month now, we have grown to love this child as a part of our family and get so attached.

Well today, my friends... we got remarkable news: KYLE AND SHANNON ARE ADOPTING HIM! YAY!

I will keep you informed on the process.

But there is more: they are also adopting a little girl who is due on June 30!! So, in February before they got "little Buddy" they had no kids, and their hearts still ached for a child they could call theirs. I have prayed for so long and bore the burden with them...and it is so good to see God give us "...more than we can ask or imagine!" So in June, our family will have 2 new babies...4 months apart! So basically TWINS! haha!

Guys, our God really is a "...father to the fatherless!"

I am Official...

2008-03-26T15:14:00.000-05:00

So, I have spent the past month trying to get an Alabama driver's license and tag. Obstacles. Everywhere. First, I couldnt find my social security card or the time to go apply for a new one. So when I finally did get it, I headed to the DMV. Well, you have to have an OFFICIAL birth certificate from the place you were born. So, 2 weeks later, I got back to Georgia to get that. And I think I am all set. No no.

I went yesterday to the DMV again to get my tag and license and no joke, I was the next person in line and they had a FIRE DRILL! So I just left.

I go back today at 7:30 am, thinking I would beat everyone up there. Once again, wrong. I waited for over an hour to get my license. But I got it! Yay! Then on to get my tag...(oh boy).

I got in line and had to get my title faxed to the DMV. That took forever. Then once they got my title, they informed me that I had to get the power of attorney over my dad to sign for him since both of our names were on the title. I lost it. By this point I was just frustrated. It had to be notarized and everything. SO...here I am with NO IDEA how to get something notarized and then I remember that a lady I worked with in the Campus Outreach Office could do that. So here I go...getting the power of attorney notarized. I took a little break from the DMV, got some lunch and went back. By this time it was 1:30. I got up there to the window and realized I had already lost my license. But luckily, someone had found it on the ground and turned it in for me! So, we got everything squared away and now I am an official resident of Alabama (9 years after I started living here!!)

So if you see my car with an Alabama tag, please recognize it. It took alot..haha!

Laying Low...

2008-03-25T12:38:00.000-05:00

What a nice (almost) relaxing week I have ahead of me...

I worked yesterday...and not again until Friday & Saturday... I have class today and Wednesday...2 tests to be studying for, and in between...not alot! It's a much needed change of pace for me! I will be catching up with everyone as much as I can this week and I believe my soul is LONGING for that.

I am going to the Hawks game (sitting on the 7th row at half court) on Sunday:). I have never been to a Hawks game, so this is a first!

So, hey friends, call me this week and I can actually play!

***I have been trying to think of a new name for my blog, and I finally changed it. Oraganized Chaos...packaged all nice and pretty. That describes me perfectly.

The Shin Bone's Connected to the...

2008-03-05T08:00:00.001-06:00

pelvis? phalanges? occipital bone?

I am trying to learn the bones of the body for my anatomy lab mid term that is tomorrow. Gosh, the human body is so complex. I just thought there were about 5 or 6 bones. The skull, the pelvis, the femur, the humerus, oh yeah, and the funny bone. Nope. Try 206.

School is getting harder, work more inconvenient, hours of studying alot longer, and time for hang out opportunities are slim to none. I am getting maybe a very small taste of Nursing School through it. I keep thinking "if I can just get through May, things will be better". Wrong. If I can just get through May, then I will take 2 even harder classes. I am hoping to adjust to this very soon!

I miss all of the fun hang out time that I have with my friends.

I really miss my family. it is so hard to live 2 hours away from them with all of the good things going on with them like it is (if you don't already know, email me, I will be glad to tell you).

Now back to studying the bones... :)

Huh?

2008-02-08T10:11:00.001-06:00

I always get caught up on the way we use words. I feel like we just throw words around alot without really knowing the meaning, the depth of what the word really means. I was talking with a friend a few weeks back, and we were trying to define intimacy (as in what in the WORLD it means to be intimate with Christ) and all we could come up with was just the "lovers intimacy", a feel-good, i love you, you love me relationship where things were going well.

Well, yesterday I feel like I might have kind of experienced what intimacy with Christ really is. I was angry - really angry- with the way some things have been going...and I pitched a fit. I cried and yelled and screamed and questioned God. And it blew my nicely packaged definition of "intimacy" out of the water. Because in those moments that I was relating to God in that way, I felt like that was true intimacy. I felt like that was a real relationship, a personal one, and one where both of us were engaged. Granted, it didnt feel good to be mad and kick and scream and pitch a fit, but it was true intimacy.

It seems like everyday, God shows me that I do not have it all figured out. And more days than not, its a struggle to believe God and trust him. But I was warned that it was a fight. But it's also a dance. I am glad that God can handle me when I am a mess, and that he isn't perplexed by my sin, and instead he doggedly pursues my heart in the face of it all.

How far is it...

2008-02-01T21:10:00.000-06:00

to Oklahoma? My friend Erika lives there. Erika is one of the most dear friends I have and we just have this amazing connection...and in times like I am in when you get minimal hang out time, you just want that good quality time with someone who knows you better than you know yourself, ya know? Erika come to me! It is only 766.02 miles :)

I Wanna Be A Nurse...

2008-01-23T23:27:00.001-06:00

I do, I really really do.

I am loving my job (even though between UAB and school, I am taken over). I took this job thinking I wanted to be a nurse. But how sweet of the Lord to confirm it by putting me in a place where I am able to serve women who are giving birth to our next generation, love on them, and care for them and their babies!

Life is changing fast. I miss the days where I could sleep in and it be OK (even though it was a rare occasion). I miss 110 Mountain St. I miss Grace Fellowship. But this chapter of my life is definitely the most realistic growth time in my love relationship with Jesus that I have ever had. By that I do not mean it has been easy. At all. In fact it has been hard. I have to fight to get in the word. Bible Studies are rare. Scripture memory is non-existent although I want it to not be. Being faithful for Katy Watters is looking more and more different each day. But being his daughter becomes more of a reality with each passing moment.

All that said, I am applying all over Birmingham for Nursing School. I want to have an open hand as to which one to go to and when he wants me to start. Of course I have my plans. But I just wanna be a nurse...

Ultimate Girls Night

2008-01-17T21:49:00.000-06:00

27 Dresses comes out tomorrow night and WHO IS EXCITED? Me! Me!

There is a group of us dressing up in our old bridesmaids dresses that we THOUGHT we'd never wear again and going to see the movie. I know that so many of us will actually be able to relate to this movie:).

With that in mind, it is neat to look back over the years and think about all of the weddings I have been in and what those brides and their marriages mean to me. I am so thankful to have so many GREAT friends! Below are just a few of the weddings I have been in lately...

One of my favorite things...

2008-01-14T18:27:00.000-06:00

Ever "lose" your socks in the dryer? I have the solution to that frustrating problem! I have started safety pinning my socks together once I take them off and I never "lose" them anymore! The safety pin doesn't rust in the washer AND you can keep up with all 800 pair of socks that you have!

That's a NEGATIVE, Ghost-Rider

2008-01-14T12:33:00.000-06:00

So I haven't been exposed to TB. Just bruised. So Julie, quit warming up your voice, there won't be a funeral anytime soon because of TB for me!

Whadya Think?

2008-01-13T22:33:00.001-06:00

I went Friday to get my TB skin test and this is my arm where they put the stuff in. The last time I got one (in December) it did not look like this. It simply bubbled up and went away. I got this Friday morning and it is Sunday night and this is what I got. I go tomorrow to get it read. I will update and let you know:) I don't think I have it, but hmmm...it's just weird. Enough to get me concerned. Let's keep in mind too, I am DRAMATIC!

Lois?

2008-01-13T22:22:00.000-06:00

More than one person has told me that I look like "Lois" on General Hospital. Had no idea who she was so I googled her. What do y'all think?

I never thought I'd see it..

2008-01-10T07:36:00.000-06:00

I have seen some interesting stuff since I started working at UAB. The 2 most notable are babies with extra fingers (it is ALOT more common that you think) and baby boys being circumcised. Those things are common everyday things for me now!

I got good news yesterday: I can start nursing school in the FALL instead of the Spring! Yay! What does that mean for me right now? It means I have to take an extra class and study alot harder than I was expecting. Goodbye, social life :)

In a Nutshell...

2008-01-01T18:01:00.000-06:00

It has been a while since I updated. I will give you highlights of my life over the past month...

* I am working at UAB in the mother/baby unit. I am on a high high learning curve with this job. I am excited because I am getting so much experience to take into Nursing School. This is my first "real world job". Everything is adjusting. I wake up at 5:30 am. Whoa.

* I moved. I live in an apartment with a friend that went to UNA, Tiffany Murdock.

* I am in a wedding this weekend. Stacey Wilson and Brad Booth are getting married this weekend! (can we say 27 dresses?)

* I start school at Jeff State Jan 7th

* I love the church I have been going to...Oak Mountain Pres. I leave there wanting to know this Jesus more. It's real. His grace is good.

* I have made some fun new friends. Refreshing. Whitney, Julie :)

All in all, things are going good. They are just different. I am learning that I am more introverted than I ever imagined. The Lord is teaching me so much about who he is. Without my hard strivings for perfection.

Pleased? Displeased?

2007-12-07T22:43:00.000-06:00

I have been thinking lately...

God's love is unconditional for us, right? It is based on NOTHING more than the life and death of Jesus Christ. We cannot be loved more or less if we are in him. We are loved PERFECTLY because of Christ. His love towards us doesnt change.

So...here is my new question: Can we really please or displease him? I feel like if I please someone they favor me more in that moment than if I were to displease them. I know that God wants me to live in obedience not so that he will love me more, but because that is what he knows and has told me will lead to more enjoyment in him. Can we really displease God or is that saying that we can change the way he relates to us? I believe that I had nothing to do with God pursuing my heart and saving me, and I just don't know if I think that I could really affect God's demeanor towards me. I also think that if we are IN CHRIST, then how could he ever be displeased? He is Emmanuel "God with us". No sin. No displeasing the Father. Maybe I have the definition of pleased and displeased wrong. I don't know...I would love your wisdom!!

I am learning alot about my love relationship with Jesus and I would absolutely love your thoughts.

A Yellow Brick Road and a Fireman

2007-11-16T13:33:00.000-06:00

If you know much about me, you know I am CRAZY about my niece and nephew. This is my Lily. She is 5, and acts like she is 25. She dressed up as Dorothy for Halloween...

And.....This is my nephew, Andy. He makes me smile. His face just lights up all the time! Look at him. He was a fireman.

OK that's all. Just wanted y'all to meet them!

always a bridemaid...

2007-11-10T14:01:00.000-06:00

doing the bachelorette thing. Just wanted to post a few pics of the weekend last weekend. We went to Twist n Shout and had a good time...then we had a lingerie shower the next morning followed by a brunch for the bride! (Erika, me, Stacey(getting married Jan 5)) What an honor to be a part of these 2 marriages! Erika made name tags for us all to wear that night..interesting to say the LEAST

Just a sidenote: I had 6 parties last weekend and when I went to the doctor for my post op appointment, I found out I have a staph infection from my surgery, NO WONDER I WAS IN SO MUCH PAIN!!

It was fun, nonetheless!